What Kind of Mommy Are You?

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Being a mom is a full time job. Often we're worried we're not doing it the best we can and we fear we may be affecting our children's long-term growth.

There are 16 different Mommy Styles that have been identified, and being aware of your strengths and blind spots will help you be a more effective parent. Answer 4 questions to uncover a better understanding of yourself and to discover what kind of special mom you are.

Parenting Styles

Question:

  1. Although you probably agree with some of each, which of these two descriptions sounds more like you?


    Extraverted mothers are energized by going, doing, interacting and experiencing. They are typically “in the know” and get children out to experience the world. Too much time isolated at home can make them feel shaky and ungrounded. They are uncomfortable with a child who is more of a loner and needs a lot of solitude.

    They also:

    • Like to be around people a lot
    • Prefer a public role
    • Can sometimes be easily distracted
    • Prefer to do lots of things at once
    • Are outgoing & enthusiastic

    Introverted mothers are energized by solitude and time alone. They are observant, reflective and prefer one-on-one interactions. They know their children as individuals and provide them with “downtime” to unwind and recharge. Drained by too much interaction, they must guard their energy to make it through the day without exploding.

    They also:

    • Feel comfortable being alone
    • Prefer to work "behind-the-scene"
    • Have good powers of concentration
    • Prefer to focus on one thing at a time
    • Are self-contained and reserved
  2. Which of the following two describes you better?


    Sensing mothers focus on details and specifics. They attend to practicalities and the here and now. Hands-on mothers, they see to children’s basic needs and do concrete activities with them. They struggle to join in a child’s imagination or understand a child who is different. They can get stuck in a rut.

    They also:

    • Live in the here-and-now
    • Trust actual experience
    • Like to use established skills
    • Like step-by-step instructions
    • Work at a steady pace

    Intuitive mothers focus on the big picture and possibilities. They quickly leap from facts to patterns and themes. They encourage children’s creativity and imagination, point up options and offer them choices. Drained by the nitty-gritty, they struggle to deal with practicalities and be realistic.

    They also:

    • Think about future implications
    • Trust their gut instincts
    • Prefer to learn new skills
    • Like to figure things out for themselves
    • Work in bursts of energy
  3. Which of the following two descriptions sounds more like you?


    Thinking mothers trust logic, objectivity and impersonal analysis. They let children do for themselves, foster independence and answer children’s why’s in order to fuel their rational development. They struggle to tune in to and be patient with children’s irrational feelings.

    They also:

    • Value honesty and fairness
    • Are most convinced by rational arguments
    • Are honest and direct

    Feeling mothers rely on values, feelings and personal information to decide. They strive to be physically and emotionally close, attuned to children’s feelings, and go to great lengths to make them happy. Seeking family harmony, they struggle to say no and be firm if it may cause conflict.

    They also:

    • Value harmony and compassion
    • Are most convinced by how they feel
    • Are diplomatic and tactful
  4. Which of the following two descriptions sounds more like you? And remember, there is no wrong or right answer.


    Judging mothers are intentional mothers who like structure, plans, limits, and order. They are adept at organizing day-to-day living so kids feel secure and don’t miss out. They aim to get things done, on time, and in the right way, but struggle to adapt to the unexpected, relax and have fun.

    They also:

    • Work first, play later
    • Seek closure
    • See the need for most rules
    • Like to make & stick with plans
    • Find comfort in schedules

    Perceiving mothers take things as they come and keep their options open. They are flexible and spontaneous, and generally tolerant and accepting of children. They enjoy hanging out and can be relaxed about clutter, but struggle to do chores regularly and keep the house in order.

    They also:

    • Play first, work later
    • May have difficulty making some decisions
    • Question the need for many rules
    • Like to keep plans flexible
    • Want the freedom to be spontaneous

You must select an answer to continue.